Today feels like the pause before the unfolding of an important event – like the breath we hold just before diving into fresh waters, or the butterflies we feel in our stomach before making a new commitment, or the prayer we whisper quickly before starting a speech in front of an eminent audience. Today is September 15 2008, and tomorrow may go down in history as the day Malaysia was reborn.

There is an air of muted excitement amongst Malaysians… a quickening in our hearts mixed with trepidation. Adrenalin flows through our veins as walk around with composed faces; there is a slight flush on our cheeks. We feel we are on the brink of something about to happen. It is the feeling we have when we are waiting for a new date – our eagerness is mixed with anxiety; we are slightly afraid that he/she will not show up, and hope that we will not be disappointed by what we see. We know we want change, but we are not sure if this particular change is the one we want.

The recent arrests of our Member of Parliament Teresa Kok, the influential blogger Raja Petra, and the journalist Tan Hoon Cheng under the Internal Security Act have shocked Malaysians. Even those who favoured the existence of the ISA as a tool against potential terrorists were dismayed at its use for such flimsy reasons. The poor justification by Home Affairs Minister Syed Hamid Albar for Tan Hoon Cheng’s detention – purportedly for ‘her protection’ – is a slap to our faces. Does Barisan Nasional think the Malaysian people are stupid?

It is yet another gross miscalculation on part of the BN government – on top of the mismanagement of the Ahmad Ismail affair, the poor handling of the Permatang Pauh elections, the ludicrous charges of sodomy against Anwar Ibrahim and the embarrassing spectacle surrounding the DNA Bill. BN’s tactics over the past 6½ months have been thinly veiled, shameless, and uncreative. They have not understood what is evident to all – that Malaysians will not be content with the same old racist politics, corruption, abuses of power, impunity and mismanagement of state resources. What irks Malaysians most is that BN politicians treat us like we are dumb, immature and easily frightened.

There is an air of anticipation about the change of government promised by Pakatan Rakyat tomorrow. For a while, I was undecided if this is the best course of action for the people of Malaysia. I still believe that people voted for MPs on the basis of parties and not individuals in the March 2008 elections. Granted, the elections were neither fully free nor fully fair, and gerrymandering meant that each vote was given unequal weight. Nevertheless, most people decided to vote either for BN or the Opposition. Therefore, despite my private belief that a PR-led government is far more likely to bring needed reform than an ossifying BN-led one, I have been sitting on the fence with regard to a possible September 16th take-over. Is a walkover by MPs the best way of achieving this much needed regime change?

The use of the ISA in this manner, however, is a deathblow to the legitimacy of the BN government. It is the final straw in a series of poorly conceived political moves, a desperate gesture made by those who, anticipating failure, act as if they have nothing to lose. This wretched act, along with Pakatan’s assurances of the success of a walkover on September 16, leave many breathless… waiting and hoping for positive change. I am convinced that this will happen. If BN politicians are gracious (and wise) they will know that it is time to back off, regroup and change their tactics – to remake themselves into the leaders that the Malaysian people want. However, their actions in the past six months suggest that they will not. Our fears lie not in what Malaysia will become with Anwar Ibrahim as Prime Minister, for we have become accustomed to this possibility, but in what nasty reprisals UMNO and its Youth Wing may concoct in order to disturb the peace and justify the call for a state of emergency. Will the Mat Rempits be encouraged to rear their bikes, gesture rudely, and start riots?

If Pakatan is successful, we must remember that having them in power will not, in itself, give Malaysians the society that we want. Neither will it guarantee that we have the leadership that we need. There is a danger that PR politicians will fall into the same old traps that BN politicians have been lured into. If so, we will remain in the same mess in which we find ourselves today.

What we really need is commitment to what is right and just, not a call to action because it is politically expedient. We need commitment to the reform of the judiciary and the upholding of the rule of law. We need to clean up our government – to redesign processes and policies so that they are egalitarian and transparent. We need members of Parliament to speak boldly with our voice (not theirs) and we need unfettered space for civil society.

Malaysians are looking for new leadership. We don’t need politicians who lie to us and prey on our fears; we need leaders who demonstrate political and social maturity – who bring people together, respond to our needs, and call out the best in us. We need leaders who calm our anxieties and allay our worries – not by taking sides or by playing one group against another through fragmented discourses. We need leaders who value all of us as equal citizens of Malaysia.

We need a radical commitment to the formation of a transparent, accountable, democratic and just government. We need leaders who will revisit all the laws and policies that cripple citizens – that inhibit our freedoms – so that we cannot challenge those in power. We need leaders who will do what is right, not what is convenient.

For this, we Malaysians are breathless. We are sick of rhetoric, of fear mongering, of hypocrisy. We are tired of lies and cheap excuses. We want genuine change.

Tomorrow may bring this needed change. We may witness the making of history. If it happens, then my hope is that PR will not get too heady with success and that BN will not burn down what is left of Malaysia through inciting riots and declaring a state of emergency. What Malaysians need is for both PR and BN to remember that we exist not because of them, or for them. We need them to remember that we entrust our futures and our lives to them. We give them power, but they remain accountable to us. Only then will they be the leaders we have been waiting for.

Father, hear our prayers and calm our fears. Let Your will be done in the nation of Malaysia; may Your plans be brought to life. May the winds of change help us to form a fair and just society. Help us to reset the structures of power so that we can uphold what is true and right while extending mercy to those who are helpless. Hear our prayers, oh God, and hold us in the palm of Your hand. We trust in Your mercy and grace.

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